How to let go off emotions — Few personal and practical tips

Photo by Lindsay Henwood on Unsplash

We can all agree that the ‘most intense yet unaware relationship’ we all have is the one with ourselves. No one gave us the guide book or the manual to control our mind. This made our relationship with ourselves difficult and “hard and comprehend”. Just imagine that for a second. The only entity in the world that we have direct access and control over is the one that we do not know how to organised and control. We are excellent at organizing and controlling things outside of us. Is that not strange?

Anyhow, let us come to the point. One of the worst and devastating consequences of an unorganized mind is how we end up “holding onto emotions” without our awareness. We accumulate events and situations from the past to the extent that it starts showing up on our physical body. Up until a few years ago, I was not even aware of the accumulation of thoughts and situations my body was holding onto. I realized that though I am inherently a joyous human, my body is in a very rigid state many times. Without my awareness,

• my head gets tight
• my fists clutch tight
• my shoulders shrug tight and
• anxiety sets in (even when I am alone and in a non-threatened environment)

I knew that something had to die to make room for something fresh to grow.

Holding onto anything which is no longer serving us and ideally should be released, is going to lead to not just mental relief but physical repairs as well. The following are some practical ways I found helpful personally to release these feelings and be more aware before accumulating it:

1. Emotional Freedom Technique : This is the ancient method of tapping on specific meridian points on your body with our fingertips. According to Medical News Today “EFT tapping involves the body’s energy meridian points, which are a concept in Chinese medicine.” Proponents believe this to be areas of the body through which energy flows. I was introduced to this method in 2017 at a workshop where an Australian EFT expert was demonstrating how quickly this technique works by using members in the live audience. My curiosity got me to book an appointment with him. On day 1 of my one-on-one session, a neck and shoulder pain which I’ve had for 6 years was released in a single sitting just by tapping into specific energy meridians in my body with my fingertips. It was the most amazing feeling ever! And the pain never came back because I let go off feeling of hurt, resistance and resentment that I was holding onto for many years by unblocking the energy points.
2. Give life to the knowledge within you: Sometimes, what you have hoarded is just a tremendous load of perspective, knowledge and wisdom. Not imparting this to others can lead to all forms of anxieties as it is not innate within human nature to hold onto things of value for only to ourselves. Remember that anything of value (I don’t mean just money value but also something that has wisdom value) has an energy of its own and it will start getting chaotic inside of you till you give it a shape and form that someone else can absorb and imbibe. Hence, taking action to give your knowledge and wisdom a life and form of its own is your duty. This can be in the form of a service, a story through a video or an article or a kind word to a random person etc.
3. Talk to people who gives perspective and not advice: Many of our friends grab the chance to give an advice (with all good intentions). They are the ones to stay away from when you need an emotional release. However, that one friend you have who just wants to listen to you silently and ‘help you reflect on your own’ is a rare gem. They are pure gold. Talk to them as often as possible. Look at how you reason yourself out and fight a way out of your closed feelings by just listening to yourself ranting. Meanwhile, your friend really just listens, empathises and gives you a perspective AND NOT AN ADVICE. A perspective is the miracle formula to come up with your own customise-created solution to your problem. Not all friends are capable of this. If you have one, keep ’em close.
4. Do any physical movement: The most cliched and the most undeniable & powerful form of release is any form of exercise. Movement of any kind that can get your lymphatic drainage system moving is the core of release. Anger, frustrations and feelings of meaninglessness are some of the worst nasties you can release through physical movements where you can stretch your tight muscles and feel the pain.
5. Give time a chance: As wise men say, time heals. However, be aware that time will not resolve the things where your action was required. What I found interesting was that, no matter what, there is a bit of karma you have to go through (like a period of sadness, depression, jealousy and resentment, illness or unwillingness to forgive) before you come to the point where you are ready to let go off it. I really do not know how time decides that “Yes, today’s the day for your release.” All I know for sure is that, something unknown out there gets you ready to take the decision to “let go off it forever” in a moment; after endeavoring it for so many years.

When the process of letting go is complete, trust me, you feel the shift in your body. You literally feel the weight of the burden gone and you may feel a bit dizzy and confused. You start feeling the most positive void you ever felt. The feeling is priceless.